{"Content":{ "Cast":["Rachel","Joey","Ross","Monica","Monica","Rachel","Phoebe","(Chandler comes in","Chandler","All","Ross","Joey","Celia","Steve","(The oven goes off",""], "Scenes":{ "0":{"SceneDescription":"NONE","lines":[]}, "1":{ "SceneDescription":" Central Perk, Rachel is serving Joey, Ross, and Monica their drinks.", "lines":[{"Character":"","Line":""}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"(to Joey) Coffee. (Hands it to him."}, {"Character":"Joey","Line":"/strong> Thank you"}, {"Character":"Joey","Line":"/strong> Thank you"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"(to Ross) Cappuccino. (Hands it to him.)"}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"Grazie"}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"Grazie"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"/strong> And a nice hot cider for Monica. (Hands it to her."}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Aww, thank you. (Notices something.) Uh Rach"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Aww, thank you. (Notices something.) Uh Rach"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"/strong> Yeah"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"/strong> Yeah"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"/strong> Why does my cinamon stick have an eraser"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"Oh! That's why. (Rachel checks behind her ear, and finds a cinamonNEWLINEstick.) I'm sorry"}] }, "2":{ "SceneDescription":" Central Perk, everyone is there but Chandler. Phoebe runs in, excitedly.", "lines":[{"Character":"","Line":""}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"Hey you guys! Chandler's coming and he says he has, like, thisNEWLINEincredible news, so when he gets here, we could all act like, you know.."}, {"Character":"(Chandler comes in","Line":"Chandler comes in."}, {"Character":"(Chandler comes in","Line":"Chandler comes in."}, {"Character":"(Chandler comes in","Line":"Chandler comes in."}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"Hey"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"Hey"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"Hey"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"Hey"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"Hey"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"Hey"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"Hey"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"Hey"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"Never mind. But it was going to be really good"}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"What's going on"}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"What's going on"}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"What's going on"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"What is it"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"What is it"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"What is it"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"What is it"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"So, it's a typical day at work. I'm inputting my numbers, and big AlNEWLINEcalls me into his office and tells me he wants to make me processing supervisor"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"That's great"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"That's great"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"That's great"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"That's great"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"So.... I quit"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"So.... I quit"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"Why"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"Why"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"Why"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"Why"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"Why"}, {"Character":"All","Line":"Why"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"Why? This was supposed to be a temp job"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Yeah, Chandler... you've been there for five years"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Yeah, Chandler... you've been there for five years"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"If I took this promotion, it'd be like admitting that this is what INEWLINEactually do"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"So was it a lot more money"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"So was it a lot more money"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"It doesn't matter. I just don't want to be one of those guys that's inNEWLINEhis office until twelve o'clock at night worrying about the WENUS"}, {"Character":"(Everyone looks at him, confused","Line":"Everyone looks at him, confused."}, {"Character":"(Everyone looks at him, confused","Line":"Everyone looks at him, confused."}, {"Character":"(Everyone looks at him, confused","Line":"Everyone looks at him, confused."}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"... the WENUS"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"... the WENUS"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"... the WENUS"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"Weekly Estimated Net Usage Systems. A processing term"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"(sarcastic) Oh. That WENUS"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"(sarcastic) Oh. That WENUS"}, {"Character":"Joey","Line":"So what're you going to do"}, {"Character":"Joey","Line":"So what're you going to do"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"I don't know. That's the thing. I don't know what I want to do. I justNEWLINEknow I'm not going to figure it out working there"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"Oooh! I have something you can do! I have this new massage client...NEWLINESteve? (pause) Anyway, he's opening up a restaurant and he's looking for a head chef"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"(taps Phoebe on her shoulder) Um... hi there"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"(taps Phoebe on her shoulder) Um... hi there"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"(taps Phoebe on her shoulder) Um... hi there"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"Hi! (turns back to Chandler, then to Monica) Oh, yeah, no, I know.NEWLINEYou're a chef. I know, and I thought of you first, but um, Chandler's the one who needs aNEWLINEjob right now, so..."}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"Yeah... I just don't have that much cheffing experience. Unless it'sNEWLINEan all-toast restaurant"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"(to Monica's tapping) Yeah, yeah!"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"(to Monica's tapping) Yeah, yeah!"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"(to Monica's tapping) Yeah, yeah!"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"/strong> Well, what kind of food is he looking for"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"Well, he wants to do some ecclectic, so he's looking for someone whoNEWLINEcan, you know, create the entire menu"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"(excited) Oh my God"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"(excited) Oh my God"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"(excited) Oh my God"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"(excited) Oh my God"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"Yeah, I know! (turns to Chandler) So, what do you think"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"Thanks, Phoebe. But I just don't really see myself in a big white hat"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"OK. (pause) Oh Monica! Guess what"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"OK. (pause) Oh Monica! Guess what"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"OK. (pause) Oh Monica! Guess what"}] }, "3":{ "SceneDescription":" Ross's apartment, Marcel is hanging from Celia's hair, and she is screaming,NEWLINEtrying to get him off.", "lines":[{"Character":"","Line":""}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"Celia, don't worry!  Don't scream!  He's not going to hurt you!NEWLINESoothing tones, Celia. Soothing tones! Marcel.."}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"I can't stand this! He's got his claws in my.."}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"Alright... (lifts Marcel away"}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"Alright... (lifts Marcel away"}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"Alright... (lifts Marcel away"}] }, "4":{ "SceneDescription":" Ross' apartment, Girl, You'll Be A Woman Soon (the original, not thatNEWLINEcruddy Urge Overkill version) is playing. Ross and Celia are kissing passionately.", "lines":[{"Character":"","Line":""}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"Talk to me"}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"Talk to me"}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"OK.... um, a weird thing happened to me on the train this morning.."}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"No no no. Talk... dirty"}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"No no no. Talk... dirty"}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"No no no. Talk... dirty"}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"(embarrassed) Wha... what, here"}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"Yes.."}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"Yes.."}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"Yes.."}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"Yes.."}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"Yes.."}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"Ah..."}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"Ah..."}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"Ah..."}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"Ah..."}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"Say something..... hot"}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"Say something..... hot"}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"(panicked) Er.... um....."}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"(panicked) Er.... um....."}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Celia","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"Um... uh.... vulva"}, {"Character":"Ross","Line":"Um... uh.... vulva"}] }, "5":{ "SceneDescription":" Chandler's new window office, he is showing Phoebe around.", "lines":[{"Character":"","Line":""}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"Well"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"Well"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"(excited) Wow! It's huge! It's so much bigger than the cubicle. Oh, thisNEWLINEis a cube"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"Look at this! (he opens the curtain to a view of New York City"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"Oh! You have a window"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"Oh! You have a window"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"Oh! You have a window"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"Oh! You have a window"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"Yes indeedy! (they look outside) With a beautiful view of.."}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"Oh look! That guy's peeing"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"Oh look! That guy's peeing"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"(walks away from window) OK, that's enough of the view. Check thisNEWLINEout, look at this. Sit down, sit down"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"(sitting) OK"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"(sitting) OK"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"(sitting) OK"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"(sitting) OK"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"(sitting) OK"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"This is great! (he presses a button on his intercom) Helen, could youNEWLINEcome in here for a moment?"}, {"Character":"(An unamused woman walks into the office","Line":"An unamused woman walks into the office."}, {"Character":"(An unamused woman walks into the office","Line":"An unamused woman walks into the office."}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"Thank you Helen, that'll be all"}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"Thank you Helen, that'll be all"}, {"Character":"(She leaves, obviously perturbed","Line":"She leaves, obviously perturbed."}, {"Character":"(She leaves, obviously perturbed","Line":"She leaves, obviously perturbed."}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"Last time I do that, I promise"}] }, "6":{ "SceneDescription":" Monica and Rachel's, later. Rachel is waitressing, Monica is cooking. PhoebeNEWLINEwalks in with Steve (Crystal Duck winner Jon Lovitz).", "lines":[{"Character":"","Line":""}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"Well hello! Welcome to Monica's. May I take your coat"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Hi Steve"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Hi Steve"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Hi Steve"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Hi Steve"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Hello, Monica. (to Rachel) Hello, greeter girl"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"(to Steve) This is Rachel"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"(to Steve) This is Rachel"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"(unconcerned) Yeah, OK"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"(unconcerned) Yeah, OK"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"(overemphasizing) Mmmmmm! Everything smells so delicious! You know, INEWLINEcan't remember a time I smelt such a delicious combination of (Monica signals her to stop)NEWLINEof, OK, smells"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"It's a lovely apartment"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"It's a lovely apartment"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"It's a lovely apartment"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Oh, thank you. Would you like a tour"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Oh, thank you. Would you like a tour"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"I was just being polite, but, alright."}, {"Character":"(They leave on the tour and Rachel goes to follow them but Phoebe stops her and dragsNEWLINEher into the kitchen","Line":"They leave on the tour and Rachel goes to follow them but Phoebe stops her and dragsNEWLINEher into the kitchen."}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"What's up"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"What's up"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"What's up"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"What's up"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"What's up"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"What's up"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"(whispers) In the cab, on the way over, Steve blazed up a doobie"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Phoebe","Line":"Smoked a joint? You know, lit a bone? Weed? Hemp? Ganja"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"OK, OK. I'm with you, Cheech. OK"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"OK, OK. I'm with you, Cheech. OK"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"(from the living room) Is it dry in here? (licks his lips"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"Let me, let me get you some wine"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"Let me, let me get you some wine"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Yeah, I think we're ready for our first course. (Steve sits, MonicaNEWLINEbrings over a tray) OK, um, these are rot-shrimp ravioli, and celantro pondou sauce...NEWLINE(Steve starts to eat them one by one, quickly)... with just a touch of mints... and... (heNEWLINEfinishes)... ginger"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Well, smack my ass and call me Judy! These are fantastic"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Well, smack my ass and call me Judy! These are fantastic"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"I'm so glad you liked them"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"I'm so glad you liked them"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Like 'em? I could eat a hundred of them"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Like 'em? I could eat a hundred of them"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Oh, well... um, that's all there are of these. But in about eight and aNEWLINEhalf minutes, we'll be serving some delicious onion tartlets"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Tartlets. Tartlets. Tartlets. The word has lost all meaning. (he gets upNEWLINEand goes into the kitchen"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"Excuse me? Can I help you with anything"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"Excuse me? Can I help you with anything"}, {"Character":"Rachel","Line":"Excuse me? Can I help you with anything"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"You know, I don't know what I'm looking for."}, {"Character":"(Rachel tries to get Monica's attention to tell her Steve is stoned. She pretends toNEWLINEdrag on a joint, and Monica thinks she's giving her the 'OK' signal. Then Rachel does itNEWLINEagain, inhaling deeply this time. Monica waves it off as though she doesn't believe it","Line":"Rachel tries to get Monica's attention to tell her Steve is stoned. She pretends toNEWLINEdrag on a joint, and Monica thinks she's giving her the 'OK' signal. Then Rachel does itNEWLINEagain, inhaling deeply this time. Monica waves it off as though she doesn't believe it."}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"(from kitchen) Ah, cool! Taco shells! (Rachel motions, YouNEWLINEsee!) You know, these are... they're like a little corn envelope"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"(joining him and taking the taco shells) You know that? You don't wantNEWLINEto spoil your appetite"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"(joining him and taking the taco shells) You know that? You don't wantNEWLINEto spoil your appetite"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"(looking in cabinets) Hey! Sugar-O's! (grabs the cereal box"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"You know, if you just wait another... six and a half minutes.."}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Macaroni and cheese! We gotta make this"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Macaroni and cheese! We gotta make this"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Macaroni and cheese! We gotta make this"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"No, we don't. (reaches for box)"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Oh, OK. (he drops the box on the floor) Oh, sorry. (When she bends downNEWLINEto pick it up he grabs a package of Gummi-bears from the cabinet.)"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Why don't you just have a seat here? (he sits at the table, then triesNEWLINEto secretly eat the Gummi-bears. Monica spots him.) OK... give me the Gummi-bears"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"(childishly) No"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"(childishly) No"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"(childishly) No"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"(childishly) No"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"(childishly) No"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"(childishly) No"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Give them to me"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Give them to me"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Alright, we'll share"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Alright, we'll share"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"No, give me the.."}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"No, give me the.."}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Well then you can't have any. (she grabs for the package, and it breaksNEWLINEopen. Gummi-bears fly everywhere, some into the punch bowl on the table.) Bear overboard!NEWLINEI think he's drowning. (he throws some Sugar-O's into the punch bowl) Hey fellows! Grab onNEWLINEa Sugar-O... save yourself! (Mimicking the bears) Help!  I'm drowning!  NEWLINEHelp"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"(furious) That's it! Dinner is over"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"(furious) That's it! Dinner is over"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"What"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Why"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Why"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Why"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"Why"}, {"Character":"Monica","Line":"Why? It's just that I've waited seven years for an opportunity likeNEWLINEthis, and you can't even wait four and a half minutes for a stupid onion tartlet"}, {"Character":"(The oven goes off","Line":"The oven goes off."}, {"Character":"(The oven goes off","Line":"The oven goes off."}, {"Character":"(The oven goes off","Line":"The oven goes off."}, {"Character":"(The oven goes off","Line":"The oven goes off."}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"(excited) Hey"}, {"Character":"Steve","Line":"(excited) Hey"}] }, "7":{ "SceneDescription":" Chandler's office, he's on the phone, agitated.", "lines":[{"Character":"","Line":""}, {"Character":"Chandler","Line":"(on phone) Yes, Fran. I know what time it is, but I'm looking at theNEWLINEWENUS and I'm not happy!... (Listens) Oh, really, really, really? Well, let me tell youNEWLINEsomething... you will care about it, because I care about it! You got it? Good! (slamsNEWLINEphone down, then leans back and realizes what just happened) Whooooaaaa..."}] } } }, "Title":"Data/Friends/ToConvert//The One With the Stoned Guy.html"}