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666 lines
23 KiB
HTML
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<!-- saved from url=(0055)http://www.livesinabox.com/friends/season2/223towcp.htm -->
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<html><head><meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=windows-1252">
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<title>The One With the Chicken Pox</title>
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<style id="holderjs-style" type="text/css"></style><link type="text/css" rel="stylesheet" href="chrome-extension://pioclpoplcdbaefihamjohnefbikjilc/content.css"></head>
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<body bgcolor="white" text="black" link="green" vlink="black" alink="yellow" class=" __plain_text_READY__">
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<h1 align="center">The One With the Chicken Pox</h1>
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<hr align="center">
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<font size="3"><b>
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</b></font><p><font size="3"><b></b>Written by: Brown Mandell</font><br>
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<font size="3">Transcribed by: </font><a href="http://www.livesinabox.com/friends/season2/josh.html">Josh Hodge</a><br>
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</p>
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<hr>
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<font size="3"><b>
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</b></font><p align="left"><font size="3"><b>[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel, Monica, Joey, and Chandler are there.]</b><br>
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<br>
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[Rachel brings a muffin to Chandler and Monica who are sitting on the couch.]<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line01"></a> RACHEL: Ok, Chandler, Mon, there's only one bananna nut muffin left.<br>
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<br>
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[Rachel holds the tray between them. Chandler grabs the muffin before Monica can.]<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: Oh, I ordered mine first.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Yeah, but I'm, I'm so much faster...<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: Give it to me.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: No.<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: Give it to me.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Ok, you can have it. [He licks it and offers it to her.]<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line02"></a> MONICA: [She grabs the coffee cup on the table and licks the rim.]
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There you go, enjoy your coffee.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: That was there when I got here. [Takes a bite of his muffin.]<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: [enters] Hey you guys, you will never guess who's coming to New York.<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: [Chandler tries to come back with a smart-ass remark but can't swallow the
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muffin.] Quick, Phoebe, tell us before he can swallow.<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Oh ok, Ryan, that guy I went out with, who's in the Navy.<br>
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<br>
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[Chandler is visibly upset]<br>
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<br>
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RACHEL: You went out with a guy in the Navy?<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Yeah, I met him when I was playing guitar in Washington Square Park. Ryan threw in
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salt water taffy 'cause he didn't have any change.<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: Hey, is that when you wrote salt water taffy man?<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: No. No, he is my submaring guy. He resurfaces like every couple years and we have
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the most amazing three days together. Only this time he's coming for two weeks. Two whole
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weeks, which means yay.<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line03"></a> RACHEL: So wait, this guy goes down for like two years at a time?<br>
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<br>
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[Once again, Chandler has a bite in his mouth and can't come back.]<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: That'll teach you to lick my muffin.<br>
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<br>
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ROSS: [enters] Hiii.<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: Oh no, what happened?<br>
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<br>
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ROSS: Well, I just spoke to Carol. Ben's got the chicken pox.<br>
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<br>
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ALL: Oh no.<br>
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<br>
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ROSS: Yeah, so if you haven't already had it, chances are you're gonna get it.<br>
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<br>
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RACHEL: Well I've had it.<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: Yeah, I've had it.<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: Had it.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Had it.<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Well, I've never had it, I feel so left out. [Sees a red bump on her arm.] Oh
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look!<br>
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<br>
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<font size="4"><b>OPENING TITLES</b></font><br>
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<br>
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<b>[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Richard are in her bedroom.]</b><br>
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<br>
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<a name="line04"></a> MONICA: Honey, you made the bed again. I told you, you don't have to
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do that. This isn't camp.<br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: Ooh, then I guess the panty raid last night was totally uncalled for. Ok, I am
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going to take a shower and today I will be singing Jim Crochee's Leroy Brown.<br>
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<br>
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[He walks out of the bedroom and Monica starts to remake the bed.]<br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: Monica... [He re-enters the bedroom and Monica jumps on the bed, trying to cover
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it.] Hey Mon, I have a question. Is Leroy the baddest man in the whole damn town or the
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fattest man in the whole damn town?<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: Baddest. Otherwise the song would be Fat Fat Leroy Brown.<br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: What're you doing?<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: Just waiting for you sweetie.<br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: Are you remaking the bed?<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You know what, the way you did it was just fine.<br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: Then, you're redoing it because...<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line05"></a> MONICA: If I tell you, you'll think I'm crazy.<br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: You're pretty much running that risk either way.<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: Ok, you see, the tag shouldn't be at the top left corner, it should be at the
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bottom right corner.<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line06"></a> RICHARD: Oh, well that's not so crazy.<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: I'm just easing you in.<br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: Oh, alright.<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: Alright, you see these little flower blossoms? They should be facing up, not down,
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because, well, the head of the bed is where the sun would be. You don't love me any more
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do you.<br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: Actually, if it's possible, I love you more.<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line07"></a> MONICA: Really? Wow, well then come on, I wanna show you how to fold
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the toilet paper into a point.<br>
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<br>
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<b>[Scene: Chandler's office. Joey is there.]</b><br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Hey, look Joey, I'm just saying if you need something to hold you over, I can
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get you a job right here as an entry level processor.<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: But don't you need experience for a job like that?<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: It's not that hard to learn. And as for people realizing you have no idea what
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you're doing, hey, you're an actor. Act like a processor, people will think you're a
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processor.<br>
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<br>
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SCOTT: [enters] Hey Chandler, here's this morning's projections.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Hey thanks. Scott Alexander, Joey Tribbianni. Joey is a uh, fellow processor.<br>
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<br>
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SCOTT: No kidding.<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line08"></a> JOEY: Oh yeah yeah. I process. People want the processing, I'm the
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one they call.<br>
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<br>
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SCOTT: Where do you work?<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: Uhh, well, right now I'm in between things. You know how it is. One day you're
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processing, the next day you're not so much... processing any more.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: I was just telling Joey about the opening in Fleischman's group.<br>
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<br>
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SCOTT: Fleischman's group. Whatever you do, don't touch his sandwiches. Ha-ha-ha...<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: Ha-ha. [Scott leaves] Are all you processors dorks?<br>
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<br>
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<b>[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Rachel are doing Phoebe's makeup.]</b><br>
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<br>
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RACHEL: Oh, this lipstick looks just great on you.<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: You look fabulous honey, you really do.<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Yeah? Are you sure, really. [She picks up a mirror and sees the white splotches
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all over her face.]<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line09"></a> RACHEL: You see, you look beautiful. For god sakes, dim the lights.<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: I, I, I'm hideous.<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line10"></a> MONICA: It's gonna be ok. Ryan's been under water. He's just gonna
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be so glad that you don't have barnicles on your butt.<br>
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<br>
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<b>[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Ryan is walks up to the door and knocks.]</b><br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Come in.<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: Hey baby, I'm back... [Phoebe is sitting by the window in a veil.]<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Hey Ryan, what's up?<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: What's goin' on?<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line11"></a> PHOEBE: Well, no no, you have to stay back. I, I have the pox.<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: Chicken or small?<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Chicken. Which is so ironic considering I'm a vegetarian.<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: Why aren't you at home in bed?<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: 'Cause my, my grandmother's never had chicken pox. Please, please tell me you
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have, 'cause oh my God, I forgot how cute you are.<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: I'm sorry, I never had 'em.<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Ohh, ohh.<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line12"></a> RYAN: If I had one wish, it would be to build a time machine, go
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back to when I was 7, when Jimmy Hauser had the chicken pox. I would grab that kid and rub
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him all over my face.<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Yeah, or you know, you could just wish that I didn't have them now.<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: Can I please see your face?<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Nope. You don't want to see a face covered with pox.<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: Your face could be covered with lochs, I wouldn't care.<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: And you hate fish. Oh. That's so sweet, alright. Ok, alright, you can see. This is
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me... [she unveils herself right as a huge lightning bolt crashes outside. Ryan screams in
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terror.] Oh, I am scary.<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: Sorry, the lightning. Lightning was an unfortunate incidence. You look lovely,
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lovely.<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line13"></a> PHOEBE: I hate this. 'Cause I tell you, I had the most amazing two
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weeks planned for us, and almost everything I had in mind, we had to be a lot closer than
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this.<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: Phoebe, I have spent the last eight months in a steel tube with men, thinking about
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this moment. I am not gonna let a bunch of itchy spots stand between us. [He walks to her
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and kisses her.]<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Ok, this is the most romantic disease I've ever had.<br>
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<br>
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<b>[Scene: Chandler's office. Joey enters.]</b><br>
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<br>
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JOEY: Hey.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Hey, how's the first day goin'?<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: Pretty good. It's like you said. It's mostly just putting numbers from one column
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into another column.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Well there you go.<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: Hey and everbody is so nice. I just had a good talk with that lady with the red
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hair, Jeannie.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Jeannie, the head of east coast operations Jeannie?<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line14"></a> JOEY: Yeah, turns out our kids go to the same school. Small world
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huh?<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Weird world. Your kids?<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line15"></a> JOEY: I figure my character has kids.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Ya know there isn't a part of that sentence I don't need explained.<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line16"></a> JOEY: Well, see when you're acting you need to think about stuff
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like that. My character, Joseph the processor guy, has two little girls, Ashley and
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Brittany. Ashley copies everything Brittany does.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Well, invisible kids can be that way sometimes.<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line17"></a> JOEY: Yeah. Joseph and his wife, Karen, are thinking of having a
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third kid... Ya know what? Just did.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Really? Wow. That's some pretty powerful imaginary sperm you must have there.<br>
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<br>
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<b>[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe and Ryan are playing Monopoly.]</b><br>
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<br>
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RYAN: You know what makes the itching even worse?<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: That you don't stop talking about it.<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: Fine.<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Let's just play, ok. Good, ok. [She picks up the dice.] Here we go, double sixes,
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here we go... [She starts to rub the dice all over herself.] Here we go, come to mama,
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just getting ready to roll the dice...<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: What're you doing? Are you scratching?<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: No. This is what I do for luck, ok.<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: You're scratching. Give me the dice.<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: No.<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: Give me the dice.<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: No. Here. [Throws them on the table.] There. Ooh, double sixes.<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: We can't scratch. You know we can't, we'll scar.<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Uhh, I can't stop thinking about it. It's just so hard. I just wanna grab all
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these houses and rub 'em all over my body. [Grabs a handful of the houses.]<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: No.<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Give it.<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: No.<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Yeah, come on. You know you want it, you know you want it too, come on. Let's just
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be bad, it'll feel so good. [She starts scratching him.]<br>
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<br>
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RYAN: Oh God help me.<br>
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<br>
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PHOEBE: Now do me, do my back. Oh come on, harder.<br>
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<br>
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[They get back to back and start rubbing against each other. Ross and Rachel enter.]<br>
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<br>
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RACHEL: Oh, stop that, stop that right now.<br>
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<br>
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ROSS: You know, I might have expected this of you Phoebe, but Ryan, you're a military man.<br>
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<br>
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<b>[Scene: Chandler's office building. Joey and Jeannie are talking.]</b><br>
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<br>
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JOEY: You and Milton have to join us on the boat. Karen'll pack a lunch, you'll bring the
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kids, we'll make a day of it.<br>
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<br>
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JEANNIE: Oh, that sounds lovely. We're gonna have to set that up. Oh, I better get back.
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Hope the baby feels better.<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: Oh, thanks, thanks. Bye bye Jeannie.<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line18"></a> JEANNIE: Bye bye Joey.<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: What a phony.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Well, I'm sure you'll teach her a lesson when she steps off the dock onto
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nothing. Hey Mr. Douglas.<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: Sir.<br>
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<br>
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MR. DOUGLAS: Uh, listen Bing, I received your memo. So, we're not gonna receive the
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systems report until next Friday?<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Well the people in my group wanna spend the holiday weekend with their families.<br>
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<br>
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MR. DOUGLAS: I have a family, I'm gonna be here.<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: Yeah Bing, what's that about?<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: It's about cutting my people a little slack, ya know, for morale. Look, if you
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wanna see some rough numbers, I can get them to you by Wednesday.<br>
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<br>
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MR. DOUGLAS: Rough numbers?<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: This company was not built on rough numbers. Am I right Mr. Douglas.<br>
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<br>
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MR. DOUGLAS: Have the final numbers on my desk by Tuesday.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Uh, if you say so sir.<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: Joseph's good, isn't he?<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Well, I'm going to kill you.<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: Hey, hey, I just figure Joseph's the kinda guy that likes to mix it up. Ya know, get
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in there, ruffle some feathers.<br>
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<br>
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CHANDLER: Why?<br>
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<br>
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JOEY: Look, I'm sorry but that's what Joseph does, ok. If you try to pull somethin', he'll
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call you on it. 'What're you tryin' to pull,' he'll say.<br>
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<br>
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<b>[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica enters her bedroom with a roll of duct
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tape. Richard is sitting on the bed.]</b><br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: Ooh, duct tape. Was I supposed to bring something too?<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: This is for the scratchy twins out there. I taped oven mits to their hands.<br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: You're strict.<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: It's for their own good.<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line19"></a> RICHARD: You know, I like the way you have efficiently folded this
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tab under. See in a tape emergency you could shave valuable seconds off your time.<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line20"></a> MONICA: Exactly. Oh, I love that I can be totally neurotic around
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you now. <a name="line21"></a>Tell me the truth. Don't you like it better now that
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everything on your desk is perpendicular?<br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: If it's not a right angle, it is a wrong angle.<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: Very good.<br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: Thank you.<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: You know what. Tomorrow I'm gonna do your clocks.<br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: You're gonna do what to my clocks.<br>
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<br>
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MONICA: I'm gonna set them to my time.<br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: Well, I'm confused. I thought we shared time.<br>
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<br>
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<a name="line22"></a> MONICA: No no. See, in my bedroom I set my clock six minutes fast.
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You wanna know why?<br>
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<br>
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RICHARD: Because it's in a slightly different time zone than the kitchen.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
MONICA: No forget it, I'm not gonna tell you now.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RICHARD: No come on. Come on tell me.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
MONICA: No. See you don't understand.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RICHARD: Come on.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
MONICA: No. You don't have any of these cute little obsessive things.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RICHARD: No that's not true. That is not true.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
MONICA: Oh yeah.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RICHARD: Yeah.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
MONICA: Alright, well tell me one of yours.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RICHARD: Ok. Ahh. One of my things is, I always separate my sweat socks from my dress
|
|
socks.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
MONICA: What if they get mixed up?<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RICHARD: Boy I would just uh, I would freak out.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
<a name="line23"></a> MONICA: You would not. I can't believe this. I hate this, you're too
|
|
normal. I can't believe my boyfriend doesn't have a thing. My boyfriend doesn't have a
|
|
thing.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RICHARD: See, if anyone overheard that, I didn't come off well.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
<b>[Scene: Chandler's office. Chandler is asleep in his chair holding a paper in one hand
|
|
and a pen in the other. Joey walks in, waking up Chandler who covers by pretending to
|
|
write on the paper.]</b><br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
JOEY: Hey. Mr. Douglas is looking for you.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
CHANDLER: Why? Wh- wh- why is Mr. Douglas looking for me?<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
JOEY: 'Cause he has a strong suspicion that you dropped the ball on the Lender project.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
CHANDLER: Wha- wh- why, why, why does he suspect that?<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
JOEY: Becasue at first he thought it was Joseph. But after he asked Joseph about it, turns
|
|
out it was you. Anyway, I just thought you should know.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
CHANDLER: Alright, that's it. Look Joey, I'm sorry, I realize this is the role of a
|
|
lifetime for ya, and if I could just fire Joseph, I would, but unfortunately that's not
|
|
possible so I'm gonna have to let both of you go.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
JOEY: What're you talking about, everybody loves Joseph.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
CHANDLER: I don't, I hate Joseph, ok. I think he's a brown-nosing suck up.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
JOEY: Oh yeah. Well you can't fire Joseph. You know why, 'cause he's not in your
|
|
department.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
CHANDLER: Alright, ok, alright. So I can't fire Joseph but uh, I can sleep with his wife.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
JOEY: Karen.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
<a name="line24"></a> CHANDLER: Yeah, Karen. I'm thinking about having an affair with her.
|
|
Oh, you know what? I just did.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
JOEY: Ahh. What the hell are you doing to me man.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
<a name="line25"></a> CHANDLER: Oh well it's not me, it's my character, Chandy. Yeah the
|
|
rogue processor who seduces his co-worker's wives for sport and then laughs about it the
|
|
next day at the water cooler. In fact, I have her panties right there in my drawer.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
JOEY: Really?<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
CHANDLER: No freakshow, she's fictional.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
JOEY: Take it easy. If it means that much to you, I'll uh, I'll go find something else.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
CHANDLER: Thank you.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
JOEY: It's just that, I, I'm gonna miss Joseph. I liked him. His wife, she was hot.
|
|
[Chadler pushes him out the door by the face.]<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
<b>[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel and Ross are in the kitchen. Phoebe is
|
|
sitting at the couch with oven mits on her hands.]</b><br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
PHOEBE: Can I please take these off? I swear I won't scratch.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RACHEL: No sorry hon, Monica's orders.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RYAN: [Comes out of the bathroom, also with oven mits on his hands.] Well that wasn't
|
|
easy.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
ROSS: Ok, dinner's on.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RACHEL: And there's a peach cobbler warming in the oven so the plate's gonna be hot but
|
|
that shouldn't be a problem for you.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
ROSS: Alright you kids, bye now.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
PHOEBE and RYAN: Bye. [waving]<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
<a name="line26"></a> ROSS: Oh look, a low budget puppet show.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
PHOEBE: It's such a shame you can't see which finger I'm holding up.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
[Ross and Rachel leave.]<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RYAN: Wine?<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
PHOEBE: Please. [Ryan pulls the cork with his teeth and spits it into Phoebe's mits.]<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RYAN: Oh, I spilled some.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
PHOEBE: I got it. [Wipes it up with her mits.]<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RYAN: [Puts his hands over Phoebe's ears.] I must tell you, you look beautiful tonight.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
PHOEBE: What?<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RYAN: Sorry. You look beautiful.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
PHOEBE: Oh.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
[They start to kiss. They try to get each other's shirts off but can't get the buttons
|
|
undone.]<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
PHOEBE: You know what, that's it, that's it. [She rips off the mits, Ryan follows her
|
|
lead.]<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
[They keep kissing and start scratching each other. Ross enters, takes one look, and goes
|
|
right back out the door.]<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
<b>[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Richard and Monica are in bed.]</b><br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RICHARD: Monica, wake up. Monica.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
MONICA: What's up?<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RICHARD: I thought of a thing.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
MONICA: Yeah?<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RICHARD: Yeah. I have to sleep, have to, on this side of the bed.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
MONICA: No honey. You have to sleep on this side of the bed because I have to sleep on
|
|
this side of the bed.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RICHARD: Or so I would have you believe.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
MONICA: No. Big deal, so you have a side of the bed, everybody has a side of the bed.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RICHARD: Hey come on, you haven't heard my reason yet.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
MONICA: Alright, go on.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RICHARD: Ok, I have to sleep on the west side because I grew up in California and
|
|
otherwise the ocean would be on the wrong side.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
MONICA: Oh my God, you're a freak.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RICHARD: Yeah. How 'bout that.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
<b>[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe, Rachel, Ross, and Ryan are there. Ryan is in uniform,
|
|
getting ready to leave.]</b><br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
<a name="line27"></a> RACHEL: So uh, Ryan, were you shipping off to?<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RYAN: I really can't say.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
ROSS: So do you have like any nuclear weapons on board?<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RYAN: I can't say.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RACHEL: Well do you get to look through one of those like, those periscope thingys.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RYAN: I'm sorry, but I can't say.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
ROSS: Wow, it, it's neat learning about submarines.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RYAN: I better get out of here, I'm gonna miss my flight.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
PHOEBE: Ok, I'll walk you out.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
ROSS: Bye Ryan.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RYAN: Pleasure.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RACHEL: It was nice to meet you.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RYAN: Take care.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
[Phoebe and Ryan walk outside.]<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RACHEL: So do you uh, think we can get you one of those uh, uniform things?<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
ROSS: You like that do ya?<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RACHEL: Oh yeah.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
ROSS: I'll make some calls. [Runs off.]<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RACHEL: Ok.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
[Outside with Phoebe and Ryan.]<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RYAN: Can you believe how we spent our two weeks together?<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
<a name="line28"></a> PHOEBE: I know. We didn't do any of the romantic things I had
|
|
planned, like having a picnic at Central Park and ya know, coffee at Central Perk. Oh I
|
|
just got that. [They kiss.]<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RYAN: Taxi.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
PHOEBE: Bye you. [Ryan's cab drives off. As Phoebe is going back in, she sees the Central
|
|
Perk sign in the window and laughs.]<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
<font size="4"><b>CLOSING CREDITS</b></font><br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
<b>[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is closing. Ross walks in in a uniform.]</b><br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RACHEL: Oh I'm sorry, we're clo-... Hey sailor.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
ROSS: Is this what you had in mind?<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RACHEL: I'll say.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
[Ross picks her up.]<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
ROSS: I'm shipping out tomorrow.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
RACHEL: Well then uh, we better make this night count. [He starts to carry her out.] Oh
|
|
wait, I forgot to turn off the cappucino machine. [He carries her over to turn it off.]
|
|
Anchors away. Oh no no, my purse, my purse, my purse, my purse, my purse, my pu rse. [He
|
|
carries her to the counter to pick up her purse.] Oh, you know what. I forgot to turn off
|
|
the bathroom light.<br>
|
|
<br>
|
|
ROSS: Alright you know, why don't I just meet you upstairs. [Drops her on the couch and
|
|
walks out holding his lower back.]</font></p>
|
|
|
|
<p align="center"><strong><font size="3">END</font></strong></p>
|
|
|
|
<hr>
|
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