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STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION
"Deja Q"
#40273-161
Written by
Richard Danus
Directed by
Les Landau
THE WRITING CREDITS MAY NOT BE FINAL AND SHOULD NOT BE USED
FOR PUBLICITY OR ADVERTISING PURPOSES WITHOUT FIRST CHECKING
WITH THE TELEVISION LEGAL DEPARTMENT.
Copyright 1989 Paramount Pictures Corporation. All Rights
Reserved. This script is not for publication or
reproduction. No one is authorized to dispose of same. If
lost or destroyed, please notify the Script Department.
FINAL DRAFT
NOVEMBER 14, 1989
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - CAST
STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION
"Deja Q"
CAST
PICARD Q
RIKER Q2
DATA DOCTOR GARIN
BEVERLY SCIENTIST
TROI
GEORDI
WORF
Non-Speaking
GUINAN TECHNICIANS
ENGINEER'S VOICE
Non-Speaking
SECURITY GUARDS
SUPERNUMERARIES
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - SETS
STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION
"Deja Q"
SETS
INTERIORS EXTERIORS
USS ENTERPRISE USS ENTERPRISE
MAIN BRIDGE
ENGINEERING SHUTTLCRAFT
CORRIDOR
DETENTION CELL
CAPTAIN'S READY ROOM
TEN FORWARD
TURBOLIFT
SHUTTLECRAFT
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - PRONUNCIATION
STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION
"Deja Q"
PRONUNCIATION GUIDE
BRE'EL bree-EL
CALAMARAIN kal-ah-mah-REIGN
DELTIVED DEL-tih-ved
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - TEASER 1.
STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION
"Deja Q"
TEASER
FADE IN:
1 EXT. SPACE - THE ENTERPRISE (OPTICAL)
The ship orbits Bre'el, a small, verdant planet orbited
by a single moon, irregularly shaped.
PICARD (V.O.)
Captain's log, Stardate 43539.1.
We have moved into orbit around
Bre'el Four to investigate a
potentially catastrophic threat
to the population from a
descending asteroidal moon...
2 INT. MAIN BRIDGE (OPTICAL)
To include MAIN VIEWER. PICARD, TROI and RIKER in the
Command Chairs. DATA and WORF at their stations.
SUPERNUMERARY at Conn. On the Main Viewer is DOCTOR
GARIN, a middle-aged man. He is obviously very
troubled. Another SCIENTIST is at his side. In the
b.g. various TECHNICIANS check monitors. It has the
look of controlled chaos that fills a hurricane center
during a big storm.
DATA
The satellite's trajectory
continues to deteriorate,
Captain... This orbit will bring
it to within five hundred
kilometers of the planet's
surface.
GARIN
We're predicting the atmospheric
drag will bring it down on the
next orbit.
SCIENTIST
Have you been able to find any
explanation for this?
DATA
No, Doctor... it is a most unusual
phenomenon.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - TEASER 1A.
2 CONTINUED:
PICARD
Won't the moon disintegrate prior
to impact?
SCIENTIST
No, it has a ferrous crystaline
structure and will be able to
withstand tidal forces, Captain...
RIKER
Couldn't we just blow it into
harmless chunks?
DATA
The total mass of the moon would
remain the same, Commander. And
the impact of thousands of
fragments would spread destruction
over an even wider area.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/16/89 - TEASER 2.
2 CONTINUED:
PICARD
How long before impact...
DATA
Twenty-nine hours... projected
somewhere on the western
continent. It would destroy an
area eight hundred kilometers in
radius.
SCIENTIST
That damage would be
insignificant, Captain, compared
to the seismic repercussions...
massive landquakes, and
tsunami...
GARIN
The force would raise a cloud of
dust around the planet, leading
to a significant temperature
reduction. We could be looking
at our own ice age.
PICARD
(keying insignia)
Commander La Forge, is there any
way the Enterprise might be able
to coax this satellite back where
it belongs... ?
INTERCUT:
3 INT. ENGINEERING
GEORDI's at a console. SUPERNUMERARIES at various
positions. The matter/anti-matter blender bubbling with
power.
GEORDI
We'd need to apply a delta-vee
of at least four kilometers per
second. Even with warp power to
the tractor beam, it would mean
exceeding recommended impulse
engine output by at least
forty-seven percent. It'd be like
an ant pushing a tricycle... a
slim chance at best...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - TEASER 3.
3 CONTINUED:
RIKER
(to Picard)
Given a choice between slim and
none, I'll take slim any day...
PICARD
Make it so.
RIKER
Lieutenant Worf, signal all ships
in this sector to rendezvous and
join us in relief efforts.
WORF
Aye, sir.
PICARD
(to Main Viewer)
We'll keep you informed of our
progress. Picard out.
4
thru OMITTED
8
9 EXT. SPACE - THE ENTERPRISE (OPTICAL)
The tractor beam flares out of the ship and grabs onto
the small moon. The warp engines flare brighter as we
apply power. The ship is trying to "plow" the moon
into a higher orbit.
10 INT. BRIDGE (OPTICAL)
As before. Picard and Riker looking at the viewer.
The tractor beam holds the small moon. The moon does
not move.
Picard gets up and walks closer to the viewer.
RIKER
Can you give us any more,
Geordi... ?
GEORDI'S COM VOICE
Not without burning out the
tractor beam emitter... the
circuits are already beyond their
thermal limit.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - TEASER 4.
10 CONTINUED:
DATA
Delta-vee is ninety-two meters per
second. The mass is too great.
We are having an effect but it
is negligible.
In the background, a strange noise... it begins low...
more like a million voices than a million machines...
RIKER
What is that...
DATA
Unable to identify source...
It gets louder...
GEORDI'S COM VOICE
Impulse engines passing saftey
limits. We're seconds from
automatic shutdown.
PICARD
Reduce engines... tractor beam
off...
The sound continues to grow... and seems to surround
the ship... they react... almost deafening now...
RIKER
Worf, what the hell do the sensors
show... ?
WORF
The sound is not registering,
Commander...
The sound swirling inside and all around... ends with
a slight POP. Q APPEARS, naked, suspended above
everyone, as though held by an invisible puppet.
Q
Red Alert.
PICARD
Q.
And Q promptly crashes to the floor. On reactions...
11
thru OMITTED
16
FADE OUT.
END TEASER
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/21/89 - ACT ONE 5.
ACT ONE
FADE IN:
17 EXT. SPACE - THE ENTERPRISE (OPTICAL)
As it orbits Bre'el, maintaining its distance to the
moon, Klyo.
PICARD (V.O.)
Captain's log, supplemental. We
are no closer to finding a
solution to the deteriorating
orbit of the Bre'el Four moon...
but with the arrival of Q, we now
have a good idea of the cause.
18 INT. BRIDGE
Starting with Q putting on his jump suit...
GEORDI (O.S.)
We couldn't drive the tractor
emitters hard enough, Captain...
Panning to find Picard is getting a debriefing on the
failed moon attempt from Geordi...
GEORDI
The beam was flexing, and it was
impossible to transfer enough
kinetic energy to the moon...
PICARD
Our options?
GEORDI
We did everything by the book and
a little extra... we need more
time or more power and we're short
on both. I'll take a look and see
if there are any rules I haven't
broken.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/20/89 - ACT ONE 5A.
18 CONTINUED:
PICARD
Keep me advised.
Geordi EXITS. Picard turns toward Q with loathing
in his eyes...
RIKER
We know you're behind this, Q...
Q
(re: the jumpsuit)
It's not at all my best color...
Behind what... what are you
blathering about, Riker...
Picard moves to confront him...
PICARD
What kind of twisted pleasure does
it give you to bring terror into
their lives... ?
Q
What? Whose lives?
PICARD
The millions of people down there
who are watching as their moon
falls out of the sky...
Q
I haven't the vaguest idea what
you're talking about... and I have
a much more serious problem...
I am no longer a member of the
continuum. My superiors have
decided to punish me.
Picard frowns... refusing to participate with this
game of Q's...
PICARD
And punish us as well, it seems...
He ignores Q, moves away...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/20/89 - ACT ONE 6.
18 CONTINUED: (2)
Q
They said I've spread too much
chaos through the universe and
they have stripped me of all my
powers.
They look at him with disbelieving eyes. Off their
reaction --
Q
You do not believe me... ? Would
I humiliate myself like this?
RIKER
If it served your purposes, yes.
Q
It is the truth. I stand before
you, defrocked. I'm condemned
to be a member of this lowest of
species. A normal, imperfect,
lumpen human being.
TROI
Turning you into a human was part
of their punishment... ?
Q
No, it was my request. I could
have chosen to exist as a
Markoffian fire lizard or a
Belzoidian flea, anything I
wished... so long as it was
mortal, but I only had a fraction
of a second to mull and I chose...
"this"... and asked them to bring
me here...
TROI
Why?
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/20/89 - ACT ONE 7.
18 CONTINUED: (3)
Q
(moving to Picard)
Because in all the universe you
are the closest thing I have to
a friend, Jean-Luc.
Q smiles to Picard... Picard's look says it all. Data
aims a tricorder at Q.
DATA
He is reading as fully human.
Q
(looks around the
bridge)
Is there an echo in here?
TROI
I'm even sensing an emotional
presence in him. I would
normally describe it as being
terrified.
Q
How rude.
Enough of this... Picard rises, moves back into the
fray.
PICARD
Q, what is it you want...
Q
Your compassion...
(a beat, off Picard's
look)
All right... Sanctuary on your
ship... dreary as that may sound
to both of us...
PICARD
Return the moon to its orbit.
Q
I have no powers. Q the ordinary.
PICARD
Q, the liar. Q, the misanthrope.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/20/89 - ACT ONE 7A.
18 CONTINUED: (4)
Q
Q, the miserable. Q, the
desperate. What must I do to
convince you people...
WORF
Die.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/20/89 - ACT ONE 8.
18 CONTINUED: (5)
Q
Very clever, Worf. Eat any good
books lately?
PICARD
Fine. You wish to be treated as
a human?
Q
Absolutely.
PICARD
Mister Worf, throw him in the
brig.
WORF
Delighted, Captain.
Q
Jean-Luc... you can't do this...
Worf moves to him...
WORF
You will walk or I will carry you.
Q
Given the options -- I'll walk.
As they EXIT...
Q
(to Picard)
You've disappointed me, Jean-
Luc... I'm very disa...
And Worf closes the turbolift doors... Riker and Picard
exchange a glance.
18A INT. TURBOLIFT (FORMERLY SCENE 19)
Worf and Q.
Q
It was a mistake... I never should
have picked human... I knew it
the minute I said it.
(MORE)
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - ACT ONE 9.
18A CONTINUED:
Q (Cont'd)
To think of the future in this
shell... forced to cover myself
with fabric because of outdated
human morality, to say nothing
of being too hot or too cold,
growing feeble as the years pass,
losing my hair, catching a
disease, being ticklish, sneezing,
having an itch, a pimple, bad
breath, having to bathe...
WORF
(acknowledges)
Too bad.
19 INT. CORRIDOR (FORMERLY SCENE 20)
Q and Worf exit the turbolift and walk down the
corridor.
Q
"Klingon"... I should have said
"Klingon". In my heart, I am a
Klingon, Worf... So you understand
I could never survive in
confinement...
The universe has been my back
yard... this is cruel and unusual
punishment. As a fellow Klingon,
if you would speak to the captain
on my behalf, I would be eternally
grateful... which doesn't mean
as much as it used to, I admit.
19A INT. DETENTION CELL (OPTICAL)
WORF
Be quiet or disappear back where
you came from.
Worf ushers him in.
Q
I can't disappear any more than
you can win a beauty contest.
(MORE)
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - ACT ONE 10.
19A CONTINUED:
Q (Cont'd)
If I ask a very simple question,
do you think you can grasp it
without troubling your intellect
too much... ready? If I still
had powers, would I permit you
to lock me away?
WORF
You have fooled us too often, Q.
Q
Perspicacity incarnate. Please
don't feel compelled to tell me
the story of "the boy who cried
Worf"?
WORF
Computer, activate forcefield.
The room is now divided by a rim of lights. Q tests
the force field. We see the EFFECT. Worf leaves. A
security guard holds position...
Q
(yelling at Worf)
I demand to be let out of here,
do you hear me? You will
deactivate this cell immediately.
(no answer)
"Romulan". I should have said
"Romulan", you Klingon goat!
And he sits down in frustration.
20 OMITTED
21 INT. READY ROOM
Picard and Riker seated at the desk.
PICARD
The question is -- what sort of
jaded game is he playing this
time?
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT ONE 11.
21 CONTINUED:
RIKER
Maybe he just wants a big laugh.
He'll take Bre'el Four to the edge
of disaster, then pull the moon
back.
PICARD
(thoughtful)
Or he may have nothing to do with
it at all.
RIKER
Do you honestly believe Q is
telling the truth?
PICARD
Oh, I agree that is highly
unlikely. But we have to proceed
with our current dilemma as though
Q is powerless to prevent it,
don't we?
RIKER
As he sits, and watches us
struggle...
PICARD
I don't see much choice.
(speaking to com)
Mister Worf, hail the Bre'el Four
science station...
WORF'S COM VOICE
They're standing by, Captain...
Picard turns on his monitor to reveal Garin and the
Scientist.
PICARD
I'm sorry to report that our first
attempt to restore the moon to
its proper orbit has failed.
GARIN
We have less than twenty-five
hours before impact...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT ONE 11A.
21 CONTINUED: (2)
RIKER
Our chief engineer is working on
ways to reinforce our tractor beam.
PICARD
There is hope... but if you have
an evacuation plan...
GARIN
We have already started moving
people from the coastal areas of
the western continent...
PICARD
(acknowledges)
We will make another attempt
shortly... Picard out.
He turns off the monitor...
RIKER
I gotta tell you Geordi is not
optimistic...
Suddenly, the room begins to glow... Picard and Riker
exchange glances and head for the door.
PICARD
What the devil... ?
As they exit...
22 INT. MAIN BRIDGE
the EFFECT continues... Picard and Riker ENTER from the
Ready Room... Data and supernumeraries are reacting.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT ONE 12.
22 CONTINUED:
RIKER
Data... ?
DATA
Sensors are showing broad band
emissions... including Berthold
rays...
RIKER
Lethal?
DATA
No, Commander. Overall exposure
is under seventy-five rems. Very
low intensity. More like a soft
medical scan... I would speculate
that we are being probed...
PICARD
By whom?
DATA
The sensors cannot identify point
of origin. It seems to be coming
from all around us...
Off their reactions...
22A INT. ENGINEERING
Geordi reacts as the EFFECT rolls by...
22B INT. DETENTION (OPTICAL)
Q is asleep with a rather pleasant expression on his
face as the EFFECT zips right through the forcefields
holding him prisoner... As the probe penetrates the
field there is an additional EFFECT. The probe finds
him and lingers on his face... and as it suddenly zips
away...
FADE OUT.
END ACT ONE
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - ACT TWO 13.
ACT TWO
FADE IN:
22C EXT. SPACE - THE ENTERPRISE (OPTICAL)
in orbit.
23 INT. DETENTION (OPTICAL)
Picard ENTERS... Q, lying on his bunk, opens an eye...
Q
Ah, you've come to apologize...
how nice... no offense taken...
all is forgiven...
He rises.
PICARD
Enough. I want to know exactly
what is going on, Q...
Q
But Jean-Luc, how can I know what
is going on? I have been in this
dungeon of yours, helpless and
alone... bored to tears...
PICARD
We have a moon that is
inexplicably falling out of
orbit... and now the ship has been
probed with Berthold radiation...
Q
(covering up some
concern)
When? I wasn't aware of it.
(off Picard's look)
Truthfully, Jean-Luc. I have
been entirely preoccupied by a
most frightening experience of
my own. A couple of hours ago,
I started realizing this body was
no longer functioning properly...
I felt weak, the life oozing out
of me... I could no longer
stand... and then I lost
consciousness...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - ACT TWO 14.
23 CONTINUED:
PICARD
You fell asleep...
Q
It's terrifying... how can you
stand it day after day...
PICARD
One gets used to it...
Q
What other dangers are in store
for me... I am totally unprepared
for this... I need guidance...
Picard frowns, getting nowhere.
PICARD
I am unwilling to play along, Q.
If you must keep up the charade,
you will do it alone...
As he starts to leave...
Q
Jean-Luc... wait...
He walks into the FORCEFIELD... bounces back...
Q
This is getting on my nerves...
now that I have nerves...
Picard pauses at the door...
Q
You have a moon with a
deteriorating orbit... I've known
moons across the universe... big
ones, small ones... I'm an
expert... I can help you with this
one... if you let me out of here.
Picard reacts.
PICARD
Q, we're dealing with millions
of lives... if you have the power
to...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT TWO 15.
23 CONTINUED: (2)
Q
I have no power... But I still
have the knowledge... locked in
this puny brain. You cannot
afford to dismiss that advantage,
can you?
Picard must hold himself back... finally keys his
insignia...
PICARD
Mister Data, please report to
Detention Cell Three. Computer,
remove the forcefield.
(to Q)
If this is what I must do to save
those lives, I will.
The field is removed. Q tentatively crosses past the
barrier...
PICARD
(continuing)
You will not be left alone for
one moment while you are on this
ship, Q. If you are human, which
I seriously doubt, I suggest you
work hard to earn our welcome.
Q
Oh, I'll earn your welcome. You
only dislike me. There are others
in the cosmos that truly despise
me.
Data ENTERS.
PICARD
You are hereby assigned to Q for
the remainder of his stay...
escort him to Mister La Forge in
Engineering...
Q
Can I have a Starfleet uniform...
That does not require an answer... Picard EXITS...
Data studies Q.
Q
What are you looking at?
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/22/89 - ACT TWO 16.
23 CONTINUED: (3)
DATA
I was considering the possibility
that you are telling the truth...
and really are human.
Q
It's the ghastly truth, Mister
Data... I can now stub my toe with
the best of them.
DATA
(recognizing)
An irony.
(off Q's reaction)
It would mean you have achieved
in disgrace what I have always
aspired to be.
A beat on Data, then...
23A INT. CORRIDOR
Q accompanying Data to Engineering.
Q
Humans are such commonplace little
creatures. They roam the galaxy
looking for something, and they
don't even know what it is.
DATA
The human race has an enduring
desire for knowledge, and for new
opportunities to improve itself...
Q
There is certainly room for
improvement. The truth is, Data,
they are a minor species in the
grand scheme. Not worth your
envy...
DATA
Oh, I do not feel envy.
Q
Good.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/22/89 - ACT TWO 16A.
23A CONTINUED:
DATA
I feel nothing at all. That is
part of my dilemma. I have the
curiosity of the human... but there
are some questions I will never be
able to answer... what is it like to
laugh or to cry or to experience
any human emotion... ?
Q
Believe me, life's a lot simpler
without feelings... a lot
simpler...
And as they proceed down the hall...
24 INT. ENGINEERING (OPTICAL)
Q is with Data and Geordi, bending over, studying data,
photographs at the pool table...
GEORDI
The moon will hit its perigee in
ten hours... we match its
trajectory... increase emitter
coolant rate so we can apply
continuous warp-equivalent power
nine to the tractor beam. We can
keep pushing it for nearly seven
hours and I think that might do
it... but there's a problem...
DATA
The Enterprise will be dangerously
close to the atmosphere.
GEORDI
That's the problem.
Q
This is incredible.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT TWO 17.
24 CONTINUED:
GEORDI
You see something here, Q?
Q
I think I just hurt my back. I'm
feeling pain. I don't think I
like it. What's the right thing
to say... "ow"?
GEORDI
(frustrated)
Yeah...
Q
Ow. I don't think I can
straighten up...
DATA
(keying insignia)
Medical assistance to
Engineering...
GEORDI
Q, I've got a few people down on
Bre'el Four who are gonna be hurt
if we don't...
Q
(interrupting)
Yes, with your marvelous plan,
you will not only tear the moon
to pieces... but your precious
ship as well.
GEORDI
You have a better idea... ?
Q
I would certainly begin by
examining the cause and not the
symptom.
GEORDI
We've done that, Q... and there's
no way to determine...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT TWO 18.
24 CONTINUED: (2)
Q
This is obviously the result of
a large celestial object passing
through at near right angles to
the plane of the star system...
probably a black hole...
DATA
Can you recommend a way to counter
the effect?
Q
Simple. Change the gravitational
constant of the universe.
GEORDI
(reacts)
What... ?
Q
Change the gravitational constant
of the universe. And thereby
alter the mass of the asteroid...
GEORDI
Redefine gravity. How am I
supposed to do that?
Q
You just do it. Where is that
doctor anyway... ?
DATA
Geordi is trying to say that
changing the gravitational
constant of the universe is beyond
our capabilities.
Q
Oh. In that case, never mind.
Beverly ENTERS from the Engineering turbolift.
Q
Ah, Doctor Crusher, Starfleet
shipped you back into exile, I
see...
DATA
Q says he has hurt his back...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/15/89 - ACT TWO 19.
24 CONTINUED: (3)
BEVERLY
(disbelieving)
Uh huh.
Geordi's mind is working now... as Beverly examines
Q's back, he goes to the computer, starts working on
something...
BEVERLY
Well, I wouldn't believe it if
I didn't see it with my own eyes,
... and I still don't believe
it... according to this, you have
classic back trauma, muscle
spasms...
Q
I've been under a lot of stress.
Family problems...
BEVERLY
You won't get any sympathy from
me. You've been a pain in our
backside often enough...
Q
Your bedside manner is admirable,
Doctor. I'm sure your patients
recover quickly just to get away
from you.
She gives him a hypospray and he immediately feels
better... at the computer --
GEORDI
You know, it might work...
Data moves to Geordi...
GEORDI
We can't change the gravitational
constant of the universe but if
we wrap a low level warp field
around that moon, we could reduce
its gravitational constant...
make it lighter so we can push
it.
Q
Glad I could help.
(reacts)
Ow... I think.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - ACT TWO 20.
24 CONTINUED: (4)
BEVERLY
Now what?
Q
Something's wrong with my
stomach...
BEVERLY
It hurts?
Q
It's making noise.
BEVERLY
Maybe you're hungry.
25
thru OMITTED
28
29 INT. TEN FORWARD
Q and Data ENTER...
Q
What do I ask for? I've never
eaten before.
DATA
The choice of meal is determined
by individual tastes.
Q
What do you like?
DATA
Although I do not require
sustenance, I occasionally ingest
a semi-organic nutrient suspension
in a silicon-based liquid medium.
They sit at the bar.
Q
Is it good?
DATA
It would be more accurate to
say it is "good for me" as it
lubricates my bio-functions.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - ACT TWO 21.
29 CONTINUED:
Q
It doesn't sound too appealing.
What else is there?
DATA
A wide variety of items... the
replicator can make anything you
desire.
Q
How am I supposed to know what
I desire?
DATA
I have observed that many food
selections are influenced by the
mood of the person ordering...
Q
I'm in a dreadful mood... get me
something appropriate...
DATA
(considers)
When Counselor Troi is in an
unhappy mood, she often has
something chocolate...
Q
Chocolate...
DATA
For example, a hot fudge sundae.
I cannot speak from personal
experience, but I have seen it
often has a profound psychological
impact.
A waiter comes over.
Q
I'll have ten hot fudge sundaes.
The waiter reacts.
DATA
I have never seen anyone eat ten.
Q
I'm in a really bad mood. And
since I've never eaten before,
I should be very hungry.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - ACT TWO 22.
29 CONTINUED: (2)
The waiter shrugs and moves off. Q reacts as he sees
--
29A ANGLE - GUINAN
down the bar, coming out from the back... she sees him,
reacts... Q frowns...
Q
(sotto, to Data)
This... is not a moment I've been
looking forward to.
She slowly comes over... with a controlled grin, a long
beat as they look each other. Finally...
GUINAN
I heard you were drummed out of
the continuum.
Q
I prefer to look at it as a
significant career change.
GUINAN
Just one of the boys, huh?
Q
One of the boys with an IQ of
two thousand and five.
DATA
The Captain and much of the crew
are not yet convinced that he is
truly human.
GUINAN
Is that right?
Guinan never takes her eyes off Q as she casually picks
up a fork from behind the counter... and sharply stabs
Q's hand...
Q
AAAH...
GUINAN
He's human.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/15/89 - ACT TWO 23.
29A CONTINUED:
Q
(to Data)
This is a dangerous creature.
You have no idea... how could
Picard allow her to join the crew
and not me...
GUINAN
It must be frightening... totally
defenseless... after being
omnipotent all those centuries...
Q
(intimidated)
I'm warning you... I still have
friends in high places...
GUINAN
... terrorizing one race after
another... teasing them like
helpless animals... delighting
at the fear of your victims...
Q
(sarcastic)
From now on, I'll do missionary
work...
DATA
That would be a very noble cause,
Q.
GUINAN
(re: Data)
You could learn a few things from
this one.
Q
Sure, the robot who teaches the
course in humanities.
DATA
I am an android, not a robot.
Q
I beg your pardon.
GUINAN
Get used to it, Q.
Q
What?
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT TWO 24.
29A CONTINUED: (2)
GUINAN
Begging. You're a pitiful excuse
for a human and the only way
you're going to survive is by the
charity of others.
She moves down the bar.
Two waiters bring Q's ten hot fudge sundaes... he's
depressed, turns to Data, sighs --
Q
I'm not hungry.
On Data's reaction...
30 INT. MAIN BRIDGE
Picard, Riker, Worf, supernumeraries.
WORF
Captain, sensors are picking up
a cloud of energetic plasma...
bearing three-four-one mark
two-zero... range twelve kilometers
and closing...
PICARD
On screen.
30A ANGLE - INCLUDE MAIN VIEWER (OPTICAL)
An amorphous mass, shapeless and changing.
WORF
Energy patterns are reading as
highly organized...
RIKER
(to Picard)
A lifeform?
PICARD
Mister Worf, attempt to make
contact...
WORF
Receiving a signal, sir... on
speaker...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT TWO 25.
30A CONTINUED:
Worf puts it on speaker... it sounds like a series of
computer modem signals... hurts the ears...
RIKER
Computer, analysis of signal...
COMPUTER
Signal patterns indicate
intelligence. Unable to derive
necessary referants to establish
translation matrix.
30B INT. TEN FORWARD (OPTICAL)
As people react to the cloud in view out the windows...
Guinan reacts more than the others...
GUINAN
Calamarain...
... and as she glances at Q who hasn't seen it yet...
there is a shot of light from the cloud which shoots
through the window... and immediately isolates Q...
he yells... avoids them briefly... but they move after
him... as Data reacts...
30C INT. MAIN BRIDGE
As before.
WORF
We're being hit by a field of
energetic tachyons... penetrating
the hull... location... deck
ten... forward...
PICARD
Red alert.
RIKER
Increase power to shields...
GEORDI'S COM VOICE
Increasing power by twenty
percent...
WORF
No effect...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT TWO 26.
30C CONTINUED:
GEORDI'S COM VOICE
Increasing to forty percent...
WORF
Still no effect...
30D INT. TEN FORWARD (OPTICAL)
The light EFFECT has wrapped up Q's legs as he
scrambles helplessly to escape... Data tries to assist
but the light EFFECT effectively blocks him off...
30E INT. ENGINEERING
Geordi working feverishly...
GEORDI
Adjusting shield harmonics...
Diverting power to the forward
grids.
30EA INT. MAIN BRIDGE
As before.
WORF
The added harmonics are blocking
the tachyon field.
30F INT. TEN FORWARD (OPTICAL)
The light EFFECT is cut off... Q is freed... still
terrified... rolling on the ground...
Q
HELP ME. SOMEBODY HELP ME...
On Guinan's reaction...
GUINAN
How the mighty have fallen.
FADE OUT.
END OF ACT TWO
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/20/89 - ACT THREE 27.
ACT THREE
FADE IN:
31 EXT. SPACE - THE ENTERPRISE (OPTICAL)
Orbiting Bre'el. The plasma cloud is still ominously
present.
PICARD (V.O.)
Captain's log, supplemental. We
have sustained light damage from
an attack by an alien species
known as the Calamarain. They
apparently have a grievance with
Q... no doubt one of many
lifeforms that do.
32 INT. BRIDGE
Picard, Riker, Data, Worf, Troi are on the bridge.
Q paces nervously. His rhetoric remains, but there
is an underlying fear that we've never seen from him.
Q
The Calamarain are not very
hospitable creatures. They exist
as swirls of ionized gas.
PICARD
What did you do to them to
motivate such a vengeance?
Q
Nothing bizarre. Nothing
grotesque.
RIKER
You tormented them --
Q
A subjective term, Riker. One
creature's torment, is another
creature's delight. They simply
have no sense of humor... a
character flaw with which you can
personally identify.
RIKER
I say we turn him over to them.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/20/89 - ACT THREE 27A.
32 CONTINUED:
Q
Oh, my mistake... you do have a
sense of humor... a dreadful one.
RIKER
I'm serious.
Picard is adding things up... realizing...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT THREE 28.
32 CONTINUED:
PICARD
Of course. You knew this would
happen, didn't you?
Q
I assure you one cannot anticipate
the Calamarain, Picard... they're
intelligent, yes... but
undependable... very flighty...
PICARD
But you have so many enemies, Q,
of various shapes and sizes...
certainly you must have been
concerned that once you became
mortal... some of them might try
to look you up...
Q
It occurred to me.
PICARD
With all your chatter about
"friendship", the real reason
you're here is for protection,
isn't it?
Q
You're so bright, Jean-Luc. Yes,
of course, you're correct. I know
human beings. You are all sopping
over with compassion and
forgiveness. The human race can't
wait to absolve almost any
offense. It's an inherent
weakness in the breed.
PICARD
What you call weakness, some of
us would call strength.
Q
Call it what you want, Picard.
I know you'll protect me even
though I've tortured you now and
again...
RIKER
Fighting off every species you've
insulted would be a full time
mission. And it's not the one
I signed up for.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/15/89 - ACT THREE 28A.
32 CONTINUED: (2)
PICARD
Indeed. Human or not, I want no
part of you. We will deposit you
at the first starbase. Let them
deal with you...
Q
But I can be a valuable member
of your team, Picard...
PICARD
As though you have the faintest
notion about team-work or
cooperation...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/15/89 - ACT THREE 29.
32 CONTINUED: (3)
Q
I can learn. I'm human.
PICARD
Then I suggest you apply to
Starfleet Academy...
RIKER
Don't use me as a reference.
DATA
He has provided important
theoretical guidance for Geordi's
analysis of the Bre'el satellite,
Captain.
Reactions. Surprise at Data speaking up on his behalf.
TROI
It seems you have an advocate,
Q.
DATA
I am only stating a fact,
Counselor.
Picard reluctantly acknowledges that fact... keys his
insignia...
PICARD
Mister La Forge, your status?
33
thru OMITTED
34
INTERCUT:
35 INT. ENGINEERING
At the console...
GEORDI
I've been putting together a
program to extend the forward
lobe of our warp field. The field
coils are not designed to envelop
such a large volume. But I'm
attempting to modify their
alignment parameters.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT THREE 29A.
35 CONTINUED:
DATA
Maintaining field integrity will
be difficult, Geordi.
GEORDI
I think we can do it manually.
The moon's reaching its perigee
in fourteen minutes...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/15/89 - ACT THREE 30.
36 INT. MAIN BRIDGE
PICARD
Mister Data, escort Q to
Engineering...
(to Q)
You will assist Mister La Forge.
Data and Q EXIT.
PICARD
Mister Worf, hail the Bre'el Four
science station.
36A INT. TURBOLIFT
Data and Q... Q fuming...
Q
Picard really thinks I can't cut
it on his starship... I can do
anything his little trained
minions can do.
DATA
I do not perceive that your skills
are doubted, Q. I believe the
captain is more concerned with
your ability to interact
successfully with... his "little
trained minions".
The turbolift opens... they EXIT...
36B INT. CORRIDOR - CONTINUOUS
Leading to Engineering.
DATA
Human interpersonal relationships
are most complex... your
experiences may not have
adequately prepared you.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT THREE 31.
36B CONTINUED:
Q
I don't want human interpersonal
relationships. I just want to
prove to Picard that I'm
indispensable.
DATA
To function aboard a starship,
or in any human activity, you will
have to form relationships.
Q
Why does this have to be so
hard...
DATA
Of more immediate importance is
your ability to work within
groups...
Q
I've never been any good in
groups... it's difficult working
in a group when you're
omnipotent...
Moving down the corridor toward Engineering...
37
thru OMITTED
38
39 INT. MAIN BRIDGE (OPTICAL)
Doctor Garin and the scientist are on the Main
Viewer... Troi has left the bridge.
GARIN
The tides reached ten meters on
the last orbit. They are already
beginning to swell again. We have
a lot of frightened people down
here, Captain...
PICARD
Your moon has begun moving toward
its perigee, Doctor... we are
prepared to make our attempt...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/15/89 - ACT THREE 31A.
39 CONTINUED:
SCIENTIST
(acknowledges)
Our population has already taken
shelter... but I'm afraid no
shelter will be adequate if you
fail... Especially for the
people on the western continent.
GARIN
Whatever the results, we know
you've done your best, Picard.
It's appreciated.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/20/89 - ACT THREE 32.
39 CONTINUED: (2)
PICARD
I'll keep you advised, Doctor.
Picard out.
WORF
Captain, sensors are reading
increased energy output from the
Calamarain...
39A PICARD
reacts...
GEORDI'S COM VOICE
La Forge to bridge. The moon has
reached its minimum orbital
distance... it's time, Captain...
RIKER
We'll have to lower shields...
PICARD
(knowing the risks)
Proceed.
(beat)
Mister Worf, keep a close eye on
Q's friends out there...
WORF
Understood.
40 INT. ENGINEERING
Geordi and supernumeraries are working the controls as
Data and Q ENTER... Q, the "camp director"...
Q
Okay, everyone, here's what we're
going to do...
Geordi reacts...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT THREE 33.
40 CONTINUED:
GEORDI
Q, everybody already knows what
they're going to do, except for
you... now here's what I need...
Q
La Forge, obviously my knowledge
and experience exceed yours...
by about a billion times... so
if you'll just step aside
gracefully...
GEORDI
(impatient)
Your experience will be most
valuable to me if you can manually
control the field integrity...
Q
(reacts)
Don't be foolish. That's a waste
of my talents...
GEORDI
Get to the controls or get the
hell out of here...
And he moves off to serious business...
GEORDI
Data, you're my liason to the
bridge... I'll need you with me...
Q
(to Data)
Who does he think he is to give
me orders...
DATA
Geordi thinks he is in command
here... and he is correct.
Q swallows hard... moves to the controls... as Data
moves to Geordi...
40A INT. MAIN BRIDGE
RIKER
Engineering, holding at station
keeping, range six hundred and
forty meters.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/16/89 - ACT THREE 33A.
40A CONTINUED:
DATA'S COM VOICE
Containment fields to flight
tolerance.
40B INT. ENGINEERING
Q running the controls... moving to find Data
monitoring sensors with Geordi...
DATA
Warp core to ninety percent.
GEORDI
Engage field coils. Tractor beam
to stand-by. Field output... ?
Field output... ?
Q
(reacts, bored)
Two-seventeen...
GEORDI
Impulse engines to full. Ready
to engage tractor beam.
RIKER'S COM VOICE
Lowering shields. Engage tractor
beam.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT THREE 34.
41 OMITTED
42 EXT. SPACE - THE ENTERPRISE (OPTICAL)
As in the tease, the tractor beam locks onto the moon.
42A INT. ENGINEERING
GEORDI
Extending warp field forward.
42B ANGLE - MONITOR (OPTICAL)
A computer graphic shows the field extending from the
ship and embracing the moon... only it doesn't quite
get it all...
PICARD'S COM VOICE
Engineering, is that the forward
limit?
DATA
Yes, Captain... we are unable to
encompass the entire moon...
PICARD'S COM VOICE
Do you recommend we proceed... ?
A beat as they look to Geordi...
Q
(shakes his head)
The two parts of the moon will have
different inertial densities...
42C ANGLE - MOVING WITH GEORDI
GEORDI
I can adjust the field symmetry
to compensate...
Q
I doubt it.
GEORDI
You don't know what this ship can
do, Mister...
(keying insignia)
(MORE)
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/16/89 - ACT THREE 34A.
42C CONTINUED:
GEORDI (Cont'd)
Yes, Captain... I think it still
might work... increasing power
to tractor beam and warp field...
Q
(to LaForge)
And if you're wrong, the moon will
crumble due to subspace stress...
don't say I didn't warn...
GEORDI
Shut up, Q.
Leaving his post...
Q
I will not be spoken to in this
manner...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT THREE 35.
42C CONTINUED: (2)
GEORDI
(do something about him)
Data...
DATA
Q, I strongly advise that you
return to your post.
Q reacts, listens to Data, hangs his head, returns to
his post...
DATA
(checking readings)
Inertial mass of the moon has
decreased to approximately
two-point-five million metric
tons...
GEORDI
It's working. We can move it.
Firing impulse engines...
42D EXT. SPACE - THE ENTERPRISE (OPTICAL)
As the impulse engines provide thrust...
43 INT. MAIN BRIDGE (OPTICAL)
As before. The computer graphic is on the main viewer.
DATA'S COM VOICE
The moon's trajectory has
moved point-three percent...
point-four percent...
Worf reacts to something he sees on sensors...
WORF
Emergency... shields up...
RIKER
Disengage tractor beam...
WORF
Calamarain attacking...
He's interrupted as the Enterprise suffers a massive
impact...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/16/89 - ACT THREE 35A.
43 CONTINUED:
WORF
Shields holding... tachyon field
repelled...
GEORDI'S COM VOICE
Captain, the impact of the blast
is pushing us into the upper
atmosphere...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT THREE 36.
44
thru OMITTED
45A
45B EXT. SPACE - THE ENTERPRISE (OPTICAL)
glows as it hits the atmosphere...
45C INT. ENGINEERING
DATA
Hull temperature rising... two
thousand degrees... two thousand
five hundred degrees.
GEORDI
Moving to full impulse power...
we've gotta get out of here...
45D INT. MAIN BRIDGE
WORF
Calamarain are resuming attack...
Suddenly, the ship is shaken again... and now the light
EFFECT invades the bridge...
WORF
They've overpowered the shields...
hull penetration... deck
thirty-six... Engineering...
RIKER
Geordi, can you direct any more
power to the shields... ?
45E INT. ENGINEERING
GEORDI
We need all the power we have to
get out of the atmosphere,
Commander.
The LIGHT EFFECT reaches and grabs Q who yells...
Data is on his feet on his way to help Q... who is
being wrapped up in the EFFECT like a caterpillar in
a cocoon... being raised up in the air...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT THREE 37.
45E CONTINUED:
Geordi gets an idea to repel the attack...
GEORDI
(to a supernumerary)
Try activating the structural
integrity field.
As Q is lifted, Data grabs him in a tug of war... when
suddenly Data is enveloped by the EFFECT... Geordi
reacts...
GEORDI
(yelling orders)
It's not working. Structural
field harmonics on manual.
He moves to the console, begins making manual
adjustments...
RIKER'S COM VOICE
Hull temperature falling, Geordi...
we're in the clear...
GEORDI
Diverting power to forward section.
Now.
The light disappears... Data and Q fall to the
ground... Geordi rushes to Data who isn't moving...
others join him...
GEORDI
Data... Data... ?
Q, not getting any attention...
Q
What about me?
FADE OUT.
END OF ACT THREE
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/22/89 - ACT FOUR 38.
ACT FOUR
FADE IN:
46 OMITTED
46A EXT. SPACE - THE ENTERPRISE (OPTICAL)
In orbit.
46B OMITTED
46C INT. SICKBAY (FORMERLY SCENE 46B)
Data is unconscious. Geordi and Beverly are both
working on him... Picard, Riker and Q watching. Q
seems confused, unsure of how to act or what to do.
GEORDI
The charge nearly knocked out his
positronic net.
RIKER
What can you do for him?
GEORDI
We'll try to discharge and reset
the motor pathways, recouple
autonomic nodes...
BEVERLY
There's overpressure in his
fluidic systems, thermal shock...
If he was mortal, he'd be dead.
Q
(with a subtext of
guilt)
Let us not overstate matters here,
Doctor... I am mortal and I
survived...
They stare at him...
Q
(off their reaction)
The cheers are overwhelming.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/22/89 - ACT FOUR 38A.
46C CONTINUED:
PICARD
(quietly seething)
You exceed your own standards of
selfish preoccupation. Have you
no concern for the officer who
very probably saved your life?
Q does, but this is hard for him to admit...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT FOUR 39.
46C CONTINUED:
Q
(more hope than
conviction)
He's strong, he'll survive.
GEORDI
Osmotic pressure still negative.
Maybe if we by-passed the flow
regulator...
BEVERLY
It would be helpful if everybody
just got out of here now...
GEORDI
We'll let you know as soon as
there's anything to tell you.
Picard and Q EXIT... Riker lingers for business...
RIKER
Geordi, the moon's trajectory... ?
GEORDI
All we did was buy ourselves
another orbit at most... we can
try again when it comes back to
the perigee...
RIKER
And when we drop our shields, the
Calamarains go after Q again...
GEORDI
(bitter about Data)
He's not worth it, Commander.
Riker acknowledges... EXITS.
47 INT. READY ROOM
Picard sits at his desk, doing some busy work...
sipping tea... a chime at the door...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/15/89 - ACT FOUR 40.
47 CONTINUED:
PICARD
Come...
Q ENTERS... they take a beat to look at each other...
and Q is in an unusually somber mood...
Q
You're right, of course. I am
extraordinarily selfish. It's
served me so well in the past...
PICARD
It will not serve you here.
Q
Don't be so hard on me, Jean-Luc.
You've been mortal all your life.
You know all about dying. I've
never given it a second thought.
Or a first thought for that
matter.
(beat)
I could have been killed. If
not for Data... that one, brief
delay he created, I would have
been gone. No more me. And
nobody would have missed me, would
they?
Picard looks across at Q for a long, long beat... no
compassion from our captain here...
Q
And yet Data may have sacrificed
himself for me. Why? Why would
he risk his own life for mine?
PICARD
That is his special nature. He
has learned the lessons of
humanity well...
Q
I ask myself if I would have done
the same for him. And I am forced
to realize the answer is no. And
I feel... I feel ashamed.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/15/89 - ACT FOUR 41.
47 CONTINUED: (2)
PICARD
I am not your father confessor.
You will not receive absolution
from me, Q. You have brought
nothing but pain and suffering
to my crew. And to this very
moment, I am not entirely
convinced that this is still not
your latest attempt at a bad joke.
Q
It is a bad joke. On me. I am
the joke of the universe. The
king who would be man.
(beat)
As I learn more and more about
what it is to be human, I am more
and more convinced that I will
never make a good one. I just
don't have what it takes,
Jean-Luc. Without my powers,
I'm frightened of everything. I'm
a coward. I'm miserable.
(beat)
And I don't think I can go on this
way.
And he is clearly broken... he EXITS... on Picard's
reaction...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/15/89 - ACT FOUR 42-43.
47A
thru OMITTED
48A
49 INT. SICKBAY
Geordi and Beverly are still working on Data who is
conscious, but has not regained full use of his
program...
Q ENTERS...
BEVERLY
He's going to be all right.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/20/89 - ACT FOUR 44.
49 CONTINUED:
GEORDI
We're recalibrating his language
circuits... he can't talk to us
yet.
Q goes to Data's side. Data looks up at him.
Q
There are creatures in the
universe who consider you the
ultimate achievement, android.
No feelings, no emotions -- no
pain. And yet you covet those
qualities of humanity. Believe
me, you are not missing anything.
(beat)
But if it means anything to you,
Data... you are a better human
than I.
He goes out and the doors close on him. Data looks at
Beverly and Geordi...
49A INT. TURBOLIFT
Q ENTERS, morose...
Q
Where's the Main Shuttlebay?
COMPUTER VOICE
Main Shuttlebay is located on deck
four.
Q
Take me there...
50
thru OMITTED
55
56 INT. BRIDGE
Picard, Riker and Worf.
WORF
An unscheduled shuttlecraft has
just been launched.
PICARD
On Main Viewer.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/20/89 - ACT FOUR 44A.
56A ANGLE - VIEWER (OPTICAL)
The shuttlecraft moves away from the ship.
PICARD
Opening hailing frequency.
WORF
Frequency open.
PICARD
Shuttle occupant. Identify
yourself.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/16/89 - ACT FOUR 45.
56A CONTINUED:
The screen changes to reveal Q in the shuttle cabin.
Q
Don't try to talk me out of it,
Jean-Luc.
PICARD
Q? Return to the ship at once.
Q
I just can't get used to following
orders.
WORF
Captain, the plasma cloud is
moving toward the shuttle.
Q
It's easier this way. They won't
bother you after I'm gone.
RIKER
Engineering, prepare to extend
shields...
Q
Please, do not fall back on your
tired cliche of charging to the
rescue in the nick of time... I
do not wish to be rescued... My
life as a human being is a dismal
failure. Maybe my death can have
a little dignity.
PICARD
There is no dignity in suicide...
Q
Yes, I suppose you're quite right.
The death of a coward. So be it.
(beat)
Anyway, as a human, I'd die of
boredom.
He pushes a button, goes off line and the starfield
with shuttlecraft returns... on reactions...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - ACT FOUR 46.
57
thru OMITTED
59
60 EXT. SPACE (OPTICAL)
The Calamarain in the distance... closing on the
shuttlecraft.
61
thru OMITTED
67
FADE OUT.
END ACT FOUR
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT FIVE 47.
ACT FIVE
FADE IN:
68 EXT. SPACE (OPTICAL)
As before, the Calamarain moves toward the
shuttlecraft.
69 INT. MAIN BRIDGE
Picard frowns...
PICARD
This goes against all my better
judgment...
(keys insignia)
Transporter Room Three, lock on
to Shuttle One... beam it back to
it's bay.
ENGINEER'S VOICE
Aye, Captain...
PICARD
Well, it's a perfectly good
shuttlecraft...
ENGINEER'S VOICE
Captain, unable to transport...
For some reason, I can't lock on...
RIKER
Worf, are you sensing any sort
of interference from the
Calamarain?
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/16/89 - ACT FIVE 47A.
69 CONTINUED:
WORF
No, Commander, but they are
continuing to move toward the
shuttle.
RIKER
Geordi, extend shields around
Shuttle One...
69A INT. ENGINEERING
Geordi moving to action...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - ACT FIVE 48.
69A CONTINUED:
GEORDI
Extending shields ...
(reacts)
Commander... the shields are
frozen...
RIKER'S COM VOICE
Cause...
GEORDI
Unknown.
69B INT. MAIN BRIDGE
RIKER
Lock on tractor beam...
GEORDI'S COM VOICE
Tractor beam is not functioning
either...
RIKER
What the hell is going on?
70 INT. SHUTTLECRAFT (OPTICAL)
Q, at the controls. Suddenly beside him, APPEARS a man
dressed in the same clothes as Q's. Q reacts.
Q2
Not bad, Q. Not great. But not
bad.
Q
(surprised)
Q...
Q2
Sacrificing yourself for these
humans... ? Do I detect a selfless
act... ?
Q
You flatter me. I'm only trying
to put a quick end to a miserable
existence.
Q2
(re: the suit)
What a dreadful color.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - ACT FIVE 49.
70 CONTINUED:
Q
What are you doing here?
Q2
I've been keeping track of you.
Q reacts, pleasantly surprised...
Q
Really? I always felt you were
in my corner...
Q2
Actually, I was the one who got
you kicked out...
(off Q's look)
You're incorrigible, Q, a lost
cause. I can't go to a single
solar system without apologizing
for you... and I'm tired of it...
Q
I wasn't the one who misplaced
the entire Deltived asteroid
belt...
Q2
This is not about me.
(beat)
I have better places to be. But,
somebody had to keep an eye on
you in case you still found a
way to cause trouble... even as
a member of this limited
species...
Q2
(sarcastic)
I hope I've kept you amused.
Q2
Barely. But these humans are
rather interesting... I'm
beginning to understand what you
see in them. After all the
things you've done, they're still
intent on keeping you safe.
Q
A genetic weakness of the race.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - ACT FIVE 50.
70 CONTINUED: (2)
Q2
And they're still at it. They
just tried to beam you back or
whatever they call it... I
stopped them...
Q
(gallows humor)
Well then, if the Calamarain will
just hurry up and finish this,
we'll get you on your way...
Q2
No, I put them on hold too.
There's still this matter of the
selfless act...
Q reacts...
Q2
You and I both know that the
Calamarain would have eventually
destroyed the Enterprise to get
to you... and that's really why
you left...
Q
(sensing hope)
It was... a tiny bit selfless...
wasn't it...
Q2
And there's my problem. I get
back to the continuum and tell
them you committed a selfless act
just before the end... I'm gonna
be tied up with questions and
explanations for centuries...
Q
Q, I've learned my lesson...
Q2
(bull-stuff)
Remember who you're talking to
here... all knowing, all seeing...
(sighs)
Fine. You have your powers back.
Try to stay out of trouble...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - ACT FIVE 51.
70 CONTINUED: (3)
He DISAPPEARS. Q smiles, rises... tries on his powers
by snapping his fingers, immediately CHANGING his jump
suit into a Starfleet uniform...
Q
And they wanted to destroy me,
did they?
He holds out the palm of his hand.
71
thru OMITTED
79
80 EXT. SPACE (OPTICAL)
The Calamarain disappear.
81 INT. SHUTTLE (OPTICAL)
Q holding out the palm of his hand. There is now a
glow on it.
Q
If you think I tormented you in
the past, my little friends --
wait until you see what I do with
you now.
Q2's head comes down through the hull...
Q2 (V.O.)
(a warning)
Q --?
He stops.
Q
I was just seeing if you were
still watching
He blows on the palm of his hand. The glow is blown
away. Q2 reacts, nods okay.
82 INT. BRIDGE (OPTICAL)
Picard, Riker, Troi, Worf, Data, Geordi on the bridge.
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - 11/14/89 - ACT FIVE 52.
82 CONTINUED:
DATA
Sir, the aliens have disappeared.
(beat)
And so has the shuttle.
RIKER
Scan the sector...
DATA
I have, sir.
PICARD
(reacts)
Well, I guess that's the end of
Q.
A cue for the APPEARANCE of a Mexican Mariachi Band...
Q as the lead trumpet...
Q
Au contraire, mon capitaine...
heee's back...
And as they blare into a song... Q waves his arms and
confetti is falling out of nowhere... and the crew
finds fat cigars in their mouths... which they
promptly discard...
Q
I have been forgiven, embraced
by my brothers and sisters of the
continuum... I am immortal again,
omnipotent again...
RIKER
Swell.
Q
Don't fret, Riker... my good
fortune is your good fortune.
Two beautiful babes APPEAR in bikinis with their arms
around Riker...
RIKER
I don't need your fantasy women,
Q...
Q
You've become so stolid,
Commander... you weren't like this
before the beard...
(MORE)
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/17/89 - ACT FIVE 53.
82 CONTINUED: (4)
Q (Cont'd)
(off Riker's look)
Very well...
He snaps his fingers and the girls are now caressing
Worf... who reacts...
PICARD
Q...
Q
But I feel like celebrating...
PICARD
I don't.
Q frowns, snaps his fingers... and the girls
DISAPPEAR...
PICARD
All of it.
Q snaps his fingers and the band DISAPPEARS and Q is
dressed again in the Starfleet uniform.
PICARD
Now, at the risk of being rude...
Q
Yes, I have once again overstayed
my welcome. As a human, I was
ill-equipped to thank you, Picard.
But as myself, you have my
everlasting gratitude.
(beat)
Until next time, of course. But
before I go, there is a debt I
must repay...
And he moves to Data...
Q
... to my professor of the
humanities... I have decided my
dear Data to give you something
very, very special...
DATA
(reacts)
If your intention is to make me
human, Q...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/15/89 - ACT FIVE 54.
82 CONTINUED: (3)
Q
No no no no no... don't be
foolish... I would never curse
you by making you human... Let's
just call it a going away present.
Data reacts and Q grins at him and suddenly Q
disappears and Data bursts into a belly laugh...
reactions...
GEORDI
Uh, Data... Data? Why are you
laughing?
Data collects himself.
DATA
I do not know. But it was a
wonderful... feeling.
WORF
Bre'el Four hailing us, Captain.
PICARD
On screen, Lieutenant.
82A
thru OMITTED
89
90 ANGLE - INCLUDE MAIN VIEWER (OPTICAL)
Garin and the scientist are all smiles...
GARIN
Captain Picard... you've done
it...
PICARD
I'm sorry... ?
SCIENTIST
The moon is back in its normal
orbit. How did you manage it?
PICARD
(reacts)
I didn't. Stand by, Bre'el
Four...
RIKER
Let's see it, Worf...
STAR TREK: "Deja Q" - REV. 11/22/89 - ACT FIVE 55.
90 CONTINUED:
The viewscreen changes to the moon in orbit around the
planet...
PICARD
Mister Data, your analysis...
DATA
The moon's altitude is fifty-five
thousand kilometers, projected
orbit is nearly circular. There
is no further danger to the
planet.
Picard and Riker exchange a look. Picard
acknowledges, relieved...
PICARD
Good. Ensign, set a course for
Station Nigala-Four.
(sitting)
Perhaps there's a little humanity
left in Q after all.
As he raises his hand to "engage", a cigar appears in
it...
Q (V.O.)
(whispered so only he
can hear it)
Don't bet on it, Picard.
91 OMITTED
92 EXT. SPACE - THE ENTERPRISE (OPTICAL)
It warps away to continue its journey.
FADE OUT.
END OF ACT FIVE
THE END
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